HEY DOORMAN twentytwo true tales of an uncommon bouncer in los angeles John P Kildemm 9781520524160 Books
Download As PDF : HEY DOORMAN twentytwo true tales of an uncommon bouncer in los angeles John P Kildemm 9781520524160 Books
Larry David, Richard Pryor, Kenny Powers...now John P. Kildemm
The Worst of Humanity as Seen in the Night Life of LA
Mister Kildemm chronicles the night life in the City of Angels as only he can, in the second installment of the hit short-read, Hey Doorman. Have you ever wanted to get a raw and unfiltered look into the often worst of humanity, that inhabits Los Angeles, California? Then this is the book for you. Terms to be coined from here on out due to this book are as follows unfamiliar gum, you're-going-to-go-home-and-masturbate-to-this-look eyes, HeliCop, and I-like-you-so-much-here's-a-second-vagina.
As Jerry Seinfeld once said, "I'm sure he's having a good laugh over this with his doorman buddies."
HEY DOORMAN twentytwo true tales of an uncommon bouncer in los angeles John P Kildemm 9781520524160 Books
Nothing quite like the insider's look into a Doorman's life at work. Pretty funny read. Will read the other books.Product details
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Tags : HEY DOORMAN: twenty-two true tales of an uncommon bouncer in los angeles [John P. Kildemm] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. <h2>Larry David, Richard Pryor, Kenny Powers...now John P. Kildemm</h2><h3> The Worst of Humanity as Seen in the Night Life of LA</i></h3> Mister Kildemm chronicles the night life in the City of Angels as only he can,John P. Kildemm,HEY DOORMAN: twenty-two true tales of an uncommon bouncer in los angeles,Independently published,1520524161,Biography & Autobiography Personal Memoirs,Humor Topic Adult
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HEY DOORMAN twentytwo true tales of an uncommon bouncer in los angeles John P Kildemm 9781520524160 Books Reviews
Full disclosure The author asked me to review his book... and boy am I glad he did! What a great fun read. I kept thinking... this is a guy I want to meet while stranded in an airport waiting for my delayed plane. His writing is engaging, fun and made me laugh out loud. It's a short read... under an hour. And I ended wanting more. The chapters are short snippets like small bites at a tappas bar. While his tales could have swayed easily to boastful, sarcastic and mocking... they didn't. You get the feeling that Kildemm is as tickled with the things he has witnessed as the "bookends" of a night out as the reader is reading them. Great work and great fun read. I fully recommend
NOTE The author graciously provided me with a copy of this book and requested that I write a review.
Not having spent much time in bars in recent years, especially the types of bars that employ bouncers, I never gave much thought to them until I read John P. Kildemm's first book, "Hey Doorman 21 True Tales." I was surprised by Kildemm's writing talent and wit, especially since I always pictured bouncers as people with perpetual frowns on their faces and no sense of humor. I exchanged a couple of e-mails with the author and was flattered that he approached me to review his follow-up volume, not surprisingly entitled "Hey Doorman 22 True Tales."
Now that I've finished the second book, I have three observations. First, even in Los Angeles, and even working in the trendiest of bars, a bouncer can go a long time without witnessing a really juicy incident involving a celebrity (there are simply no famous names with misdeeds to be exposed in "22 True Tales"). Second, even without celebrities acting like idiots, enough regular people in these bars act like idiots to easily fill two books and probably quite a few more. And third, Kildemm's first book was no fluke; he has the ability to spin a tale.
Most of Kildemm's 22 tales involve excessive alcohol leading to sex or fights or both. And while the events Kildemm describes are certainly out of the ordinary, they are still rather mundane. No one gives birth or shoots someone else on the dance floor. Instead, a typical tale involves Kildemm trying to persuade a man who brought a can of beer into the bar that either he, the beer, or both needed to leave quickly. If most people described the incident, the listener might chuckle but little more. However, Kildemm isn't most people, and his descriptions of these escapades are hilarious and often insightful. For example, the man given a choice whether to leave the bar or give up his drink thinks about it as if he "was contemplating between sleeping with Mila Kunis or Scarlett Johansson and not a forced exit versus giving up a buck twelve worth of American brew."
"22 True Tales" is an improvement over Kildemm's first book, and not just because there's an extra tale (actually he throws in a couple of extra tales). No, this time Kildemm puts more of himself into the book. It's not a personal memoir, but some of the tales do involve his own love life, and he makes a number of racial, political, and other observations. It's not heavy or in-your-face editorializing, but some of the real person comes through in a few of these tales. Considering that Kildemm is the type of bouncer who spends the slow time on his shift reading fine literature instead of gossip magazines or the sports page and is quite the film buff, that real person is quite interesting.
After reading "22 True Tales," I did not feel as if I'd read a book, but, rather, as if I'd spent a couple of hours sharing a few beers with Kildemm as he related his favorite anecdotes to me. The book has a few rough edges (he could use a bit better copy editing to catch some grammatical mistakes) but reading it is time enjoyably spent. So, here's hoping that Kildemm's customers continue to imbibe and act like idiots and he continues to let us know about them. The next round's on me.
The author is a bouncer in Los Angeles, and tells the most entertaining and amusing stories about his work life, and the odd intrusion into his personal life, because let's face it, what bouncer isn't going to sample a bit of flesh now and then, if freely offered?
This is part of a series of books, all with similar titles, and all available on . This one is the second in the series, and though I found the first one funnier, and more engaging, that might be my fault in that the novelty of the premise was probably a big factor. This book is no dud, however. Quite the contrary.
You'll find the obligatory drunks, hot chicks, fights, idiots, and the rest of the menagerie that you'd expect in LA. But more important than this zoo are the author's insights and great storytelling skills. Definitely a series worth reading, as all the stories are true, some sad, some funny, some shocking, and a few scary.
I wish the author long life, and may his guardian angel continue to do double duty so he can continue sharing the insanity that he lives every night, except for his odd days off!
"Waste of time," says the reader, who has himself worked several years, both full- and parttime as a doorman from Lincoln, NE, to Anchorage, AK. Reader also obtained his 4-year college degree while majoring in English. Reader believes book would have been a waste of time if he'd dropped out in the eighth grade, too.
The combination of sarcasm and funny makes this a hilarious read.
I really enjoyed it. It is funny, if you've ever gone clubbing you'll be thinking you might have saw them.
Same old, same old
Nothing quite like the insider's look into a Doorman's life at work. Pretty funny read. Will read the other books.
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